Empty Reassurances
by iviscrit
Summary: "If that's the angle they want to try, so be it," she repeated, more to herself than to him. "I wasn't ready... my lack of foresight could've cost me dearly. If it comes to this again..." Kuvira addresses Zhu Li's betrayal, and deals with the possibility of losing the man she loves. Baavira. For the flower prompt challenge.


Her tea had long since cooled, but Kuvira put the cup down with distaste. The amber liquid threatened to spill as she returned the cup to the table, and she reflexively righted it. Perhaps the topic weighing on her mind hadn't fully resolved itself. Perhaps she needed to talk about her concerns with Baatar; after all, he had always waited for her to tell him what was wrong, long before they had begun their clandestine relationship after stabilizing Ba Sing Se. She gave him a sidelong glance, appreciatively taking in the sight of his pressed uniform and broad shoulders, his new haircut charmingly at odds with his round-framed glasses. Training with her was already showing promising results, but she loved him best as she saw him now, his brow furrowed as he scribbled in his indecipherable scrawl on graph-paper. His teacup had already been refilled twice, while his breakfast remained mostly untouched. Baatar fit the stereotype of the engineer to a tee, and bringing caffeine-laden drinks with her on a lab visit always earned her a more enthusiastic greeting—he knew better than to think whiskey in the lab permissible.

They rarely argued. When they did, it was quickly resolved. After he had agreed to leave Zaofu with her despite Su's insistence that he stay, Kuvira knew she could rely on him as she could with no other. Baatar's unshakeable loyalty made her feel all the more silly for what she wanted to ask. Still, he had always told her he was ready to listen whenever she needed to share her thoughts...

"Zhu Li is a talented engineer," she began, her voice neutral. It was true, she told herself. More often than not she wondered at the woman's unwavering devotion to Varrick. The man was a genius per Baatar's appraisal, and yet Kuvira suspected that without Zhu Li, none of the projects would ever be completed in a timely manner. Of late, Zhu Li seemed bent on expanding her repertoire of engineering skills, seeking to learn what she could from Baatar about the more unconventional developments perennially brewing in his lab, rather than updating and improving the practical innovations of Varrick Industries.

"She is," Baatar agreed. "Varrick is too. This wouldn't be going nearly as smoothly as it is, if we didn't have them on board."

She frowned, the answer too vague for her liking, and she tapped a nail against the porcelain. The tea tasted more bitter than usual when she tried a sip, too bitter to attribute to the leaves. "I'm getting the impression that she wants to assist with your side of the tech in addition to helping Varrick."

"Is she? That's fine," Baatar said. "I could always use an extra pair of hands."

She pursed her lips. "Seems practical."

"I can arrange for her to help out in the evenings," he continued. "Maybe help with the demo tests, it's our job as scientists to further knowledge in the field-"

"Do you want her assistance in particular?" Kuvira said, her carefully neutral tone beginning to crack. "We were talking about hiring a couple of engineers to help you out not long ago."

Baatar paused, putting down his pencil. "All right, what's going on with you?"

"Nothing," she said, but the word had more edge to it than she had intended. Her face heated against her will, and she didn't speak again until she knew her voice wouldn't betray the envy she had felt ever since Zhu Li had expressed an interest in working with Baatar. "What's going on with _you_?"

"I'm trying to figure out flow rates," he pointed out. "I'm trying to quantify the projected limits of the mag-train engine upgrade. You're getting offended by my answers for whatever reason."

"Fine, then I'll spell it out," she said, wishing she could sound like less of a jealous lover. "I think Zhu Li is interested in you, isn't it obvious? She always makes excuses to visit in the lab, or... or assist with whatever project you're working on... She'll sit next to you whenever there's a vacancy-"

"Kuvira, are you _jealous_?" he asked, a slow smile spreading over his face. "I think you're seeing things."

"I'm not," she insisted. "Are you telling me you're oblivious?"

"Yes," he said, "or you're just paranoid. I think Varrick and Zhu Li have a... _thing_ going, don't you?"

"He's just her boss, Baatar."

"You're just _my_ boss, as far as everyone knows," he countered. "We've been together for almost six months now, and no one has any clue because you insist on keeping it quiet."

She sighed, drumming her fingers on the table, feeling the particles polished metal surface conducting heat from the nearby teapot. She shifted in her chair to face him, crossing her arms over her chest and shaking her head when he tried to take her hand. "We've been through why we can't be open about our relationship," she said. "Have some foresight. You're my vice president. You're the head of the entire tech sector and the developer for our military. If I let the world know how important you are to me personally, there's yet another assassination motive for me to worry about."

Baatar only shrugged, setting his calculations aside. "Now do you see how I feel?" he said gently. "I remember when you didn't come back during the siege on the capitol. I remember all the times I've put you to bed because you passed out on your desk. I remember being worried every time you had the late shift back in Zaofu, Kuvira! I think my role as the developer and vice president are better incentives for assassination attempts than being involved with you. Attempts have actually been made on your life, and I feel like my hands are tied whenever you go out."

"Then there's still the question of favoritism, and besides this isn't what we were talking about," Kuvira said, restlessly curling her toes against the inside soles of her boots. Her uniform suddenly felt stifling and a flush crept up her neck and over her cheeks. "But since we're on the topic of foresight, I don't like the vibe I get from Zhu Li. It's not just silly envy here, I have a bad feeling about her. She's always so impassive. I don't trust her-"

"She doesn't seem disloyal, I think you're just-"

"-I'm not jealous!" She stopped, breaking into smile when he reached for her hand again. "I'm just uncomfortable with someone other than me seeing your weapons development. She's not in our inner circle for a reason."

"You think she'd try to undermine my efforts?"

"I think she joined us because of Varrick," Kuvira said. "She didn't seem thrilled about how we handled leaving Zaofu."

"Well," Baatar said, taking her hand in his and bringing it to his lips, "I trust your instincts. If she's disingenuous about her reasons for being here, I'll keep a close watch on what I let her see. I know how important an unhindered reunification is to you, especially with a three-year deadline."

"I..." Admitting doubt had never been easy, but the topic of conversation made it all the harder. "I don't know if that's what it really is. I _could_ just be jealous. I want to say I don't make biased judgments but I'm not certain." She smiled at him. "See what you've done? How can I be properly objective with you around? I never questioned my instincts before."

"For what it's worth, I don't so much as look at any other women. I never did. Maybe she has a crush," Baatar acknowledged, tucking a loose piece of hair behind her ear. "I still say it's unlikely. Is it supposed to bother me, or..?"

"I..." Kuvira frowned again, even as her skin tingled when his fingers brushed her face. "Well... even assuming she's not out to sabotage in the long term, she's pretty, and soft-spoken, and not at all bossy-"

"And you're beautiful, a force of nature, and fierce beyond compare." he said, stroking the ridged protrusion of her knuckles. "What's the point here?"

"Don't romanticize it," she said quietly. "Not everyone understands that we're doing what needs to be done, there are plenty against us."

"You're inspiring," he pressed on. "You're more than an ordinary person, and you could have anyone you wanted. I've always been amazed that despite all your options, you wanted _me_. You gave me a chance to make a name for myself, and to fix our nation..." He paused, his tone especially tender. "And you gave me a chance to be with you. You know me better than anyone else, do you honestly think I'd consider her?"

She felt her face heat again, this time more from the warm rush his words brought. "She understands you when you talk about fluid dynamics."

"You understand _me_," he pointed out. "Kuvira, you have nothing to worry about. You've had my heart since I was sixteen."

She leaned across the table, brushing a speck of lint from his epaulette. "You're good."

"You have zero reason to be insecure," he said, kissing her cheek, "and if you'd just announce our relationship to everyone, you wouldn't have to worry about Zhu Li infringing at all- though I personally don't see what you're seeing."

"No need to tell them anything," she said, closing her eyes as he kissed her again. "Your word is all the reassurance I need."

oOo

Kuvira stood facing the nightstand, her hands braced on the back of her desk chair. "So during the first test, she tampered with the gears."

"Yes."

"And tried to cause an explosion."

"Kuvira-"

"And you disabled the weapon after the evacuation, even though you knew you had seconds before it would blow."

"I know what I'm doing-"

"I know," she snapped as she turned around, her voice harsh and rough. Baatar was surprised to see that her eyes were wet. Unshed tears gleamed in her eyes like liquid diamond in the light from the window, and he took a step towards her. "Stop," she ordered, wrapping her arms around herself. "Stop, not now."

"Kuvira, I'm fine," he said gently, taking another step and continuing slowly when she didn't object. "We've begun work on the colossus, and we'll secure the weapon as soon as it's operable. You were right about Zhu Li from the start, I wish I had half your foresight-"

"What good is foresight? I overlooked a possible risk and almost lost you." She shook her head. "No, I miscalculated with her. It won't happen again. First Su, now Zhu Li-"

"You were right about Mother," Baatar said, taking her hands in his. "Your judgment is fine."

"No," she said. "I chalked my misgivings up to something as petty as jealousy, and I almost lost you. You- she meant to-"

"Stop," he said, pulling her to his chest. "Kuvira, please. I'm here, and I'm fine. You trust me, don't you? You have more confidence in me than I have in myself-"

"I trust you," she said, taking a shuddery breath. "I trust you more than anyone in the world."

"Then come to bed," he entreated, feeling the old helplessness steal over him as he felt a tear against his skin and knew his reassurances fell on deaf ears. "Go to sleep, we're still ahead of schedule. Let this go."

"I can't," she said, lifting her head and closing her eyes as he wiped away an escaped tear with his thumb. "No, I'm going to trust my own judgment next time. She tried to _kill_\- she tried to take you away from me, permanently. If that's the angle they want to try, so be it."

"They can try whatever they want, because I'm not going anywhere," he said, pressing kisses to her hair and temple. "There's no more risk of tech malfunction. In a week we'll have the United Republic, and we can officially begin our life together. Kuvira, please stop worrying. Everything will be fine."

"If that's the angle they want to try, so be it," she repeated, more to herself than to him. "I wasn't ready... my lack of foresight could've cost me dearly. If it comes to this again-"

"It won't," Baatar insisted, his hold tightening. "It won't, Kuvira. I love you-"

"-then I'll be ready," she said, grim finality in her voice, and she switched off the lamp with a metalbending move reminiscent of pulling the trigger.

* * *

**A/N: I was gonna end it with that cute "Your reassurance is all I need" and then I thought NO I CAN DO BETTER THAN THAT. Hope you liked it, anon!**


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